One of my biggest problems growing up was talking to people. I faced difficulty approaching people and speaking to them. There was always a constant fear of “what would I say and how would I sound?” that I couldn’t get over. This affected my mentality and made me lose my confidence.
Whenever I needed to initiate a discussion, my hands would get sweaty, and my heart would be pounding so hard that it would seem like it was ready to burst out of my chest.
I would think of a thousand things I could say, but I would be shy and scared to say any because I lacked the confidence to do them. I lacked the confidence to speak out and speak to people. I am no longer like that now.
One of my favorite things now is visiting places and meeting new people. I can initiate a conversation with anyone and speak confidently, and I am no longer scared of the crowd, and neither do I believe that there is a clique of people I cannot approach or talk to.
How did this happen?
Growth happened to me, it took some time, but I was able to grow and develop my confidence and overcome my shyness and fear of approaching people.
Here are practical tips and lessons you can employ to build confidence in yourself:
Eliminate Self Doubt
Confidence is inbuilt. Your confidence level is determined by how much you believe in yourself and how comfortable you are with yourself. You can approach and talk to anyone if you are happy and assured of your strengths. Your strength greatly depends on your belief in yourself and your ability.
Eliminate self-doubt, ignore the voices in your head, and affirm yourself. It would help if you believed in yourself and built your confidence.
Step out of your comfort zone and talk to people
The major difference between the people who wish they are doing something and those doing it is taking action. You cannot build confidence to talk to people until you take action. Take a step and talk to someone today. Confidence comes from taking action toward your goal.
Start small
It is important to start small. If you are scared to talk to someone, don’t start by talking to a large crowd. Start with the people around you, share your idea with one person, create a conversation with them, and then you grow to share a comment at your work meeting, and soon you will be able to face a crowd and address them boldly. All because you started small and took it a step at a time. This worked for me. I am sure it will work for you too.
Do not be discouraged by negative outcomes.
One of the most complex parts of stepping out of your comfort zone is facing rejection. One of the experiences that stuck with me when I overcame my shyness was when I finally built up the courage to talk to a senior at school and was met with a negative response. It took a lot of strength and courage for me not to return to my quiet shell at that point.
When coming out of your Comfort zone, don’t overthink people’s responses to you. Remember, always how most people respond to you is not about you. People’s responses are a reflection of who they are. So be prepared for any outcome; no matter the outcome, always speak up and be heard.
Remember always that your voice is worth hearing
Always remember that you are a bundle of knowledge and ideas. So you have something to offer at the table, a point of view, and you have to believe in yourself and your voice. When you have to speak, research and be confident in your result.
Speak with boldness and speak calmly to ensure that you communicate with people. Carefully lay out your points and listen to other people’s points, too, to ensure the flow of the conversation. You have an opinion, and your voice is worth hearing.
Confidence to speak with everyone comes with overcoming fear and building confidence. It comes with practice and capacity building. These steps have worked for me and will likely work for you when you follow them. You will be able to approach people and communicate boldly.
